Kindred Spirits...

Flight 6E-624 probably doesn’t exist, I don’t really know. And to be frank, I no longer remember where I was flying to. It’s been a while. But I do still remember the awe followed by befuddlement and bemusement that I felt that entire night as I waited at the airport to catch the 6 AM flight.

I had reached Delhi late the previous night and chose to just head to the airport instead of checking into a hotel. This way I would save a bit of money as any hotel that’s even half decent can usually end up costing a fair bit, especially if travel plans have been made at the last minute and one is as ignorant of apps and how to use them to find deals as I often am. Plus I would’ve had to wake up in the middle of the night anyway to arrive at the airport in time for pre-flight formalities.

It must’ve been about 11 PM or so when my cab pulled up to the curb at terminal 1D. It was an old fashioned black & yellow taxi that I had hired from the pre-paid counter at New Delhi railway station. Mandeep, the chap driving the taxi, wished me a good journey ahead; I had just made another friend, although it’s fairly unlikely that we’ll run into each other again : which is perfectly fine with me, for who are we to put bounds of time, space and how often we meet someone on connecting with kindred spirits.

I know it’s a cynical world we live in. No one really seems to trust anyone and most people seem to be guarded and a little too obsessed with their “status” all the time. There are of course issues of safety to stay mindful of, and very correctly so. But there’s a tipping point to every consideration and I dread the possibility that one day we might all live isolated lives with lines separating us drawn so firm that the journey would no longer be quite human. And my way to fight this is to make a conscious effort to try and relate with people around me whenever I can, especially with people who supposedly belong to a “lower” social strata. This keeps me reminded that at the end of the day people are just people; higher, lower and the other are just phases, that too dependent on conditions and realities that extend well beyond our “talents”, “capabilities” and any sense of entitlement that we may happen to possess. Of course there have been moments of heartburn, and times when I’ve felt duped, but I’ve chosen to become more aware and alert with time instead of shutting myself off altogether. The upside of this has been that I’ve met and connected with absolute gems of people too!

Mandeep is one such guy and may the blessings of all the divine beings be forever with him.

As Mandeep took the taxi out of the parking area at NDLS, I couldn’t help but notice the contrast between his manner of driving and what I usually experience in Delhi. He was patient, concerned about pedestrians and rickshaw pullers, and got us on the road with a polite sense of composure that was really quite appreciable. Once we were on the highway and headed towards the airport he checked with me if I happened to be in any rush to catch a flight. I told him to be at ease from that point of view and just drive as he normally would. And if the way he drove was his normal way of driving, then I reckon a whole lot of drivers in India could learn from him. Followed lane discipline, never honked once without reason, did not allow any rashness in his driving, respected speed breakers whenever we went over one and always overtook other vehicles in the correct manner.

I’ve always maintained that the way one drives can speak volumes about one’s personality and state of mind overall. And Mandeep was certainly making a positive impression. So I took my chance and started a conversation. I’m going to switch to Hindi now as I try and reproduce it to the best of my memory. But I’ve included a translation at the end of the post for my non-Hindi speaking friends.

मैं : आपका नाम क्या है?

मंदीप : मंदीप Sir |

मैं : मैं बृजेश हूँ | आपकी ड्राइविंग अच्छी है | आप लोगों का ध्यान रखते हुए टैक्सी चला रहे हैं | अच्छी  बात है |

Thank you Sir.

घर पे कौन कौन है?

Sir माँ और बाऊजी हैं, मेरी पत्नी और तीन बच्चे | एक छोटा भाई है | उसकी आजकल अमृतसर में पोस्टिंग है | Air force में pilot है Sir |

बहुत अच्छा | बच्चे कितने बड़े हैं?

Sir बड़ा लड़का सुखविंदर पांच साल का है | अभी KG से पहली में आया है | और हाल ही में twins हुए हैं : एक लड़का, हरविंदर, और एक लड़की, हरजोत. 

अरे वाह ! बधाई हो |

Thank you Sir.

और तुम्हारी age क्या है अभी?

सत्ताईस साल Sir | 1984 का birth है  मेरा |

यहीं दिल्ली में?

हाँ Sir | वैसे तो हम लोग पंजाब से belong करते हैं | लेकिन 1982 में माँ और बाऊजी दिल्ली आ गए थे |

1984 तो बहुत कठिन समय था | आपके parents ने आपको बताया होगा |

जी Sir | मेरा birth Mrs. Gandhi की हत्या के 2 हफ़्तों बाद ही हुआ था | एक हिन्दू family ने हमें अपने घर पे छुपाया था | उन्ही के घर जन्म हुआ था | माँ  बताती हैं की अगर उन्होंने हमें अपने घर न रखा होता तो पता नहीं क्या होता | उनके जान पहचान के काफी लोग मारे गए थे |

बहुत शर्मनाक समय था | शुक्र है आप लोग बच गए | बहुत दर्द होगा आपके दिल में | आपसे ज्यादा शायद आपके parents के दिल में | शायद आप लोग कभी माफ़ नहीं कर पाओगे |

Sir दर्द तो है | उनके कितने मित्र मारे गए | कितने और अपना सब कुछ खो बैठे | पापा  की दुकान भी जला दी गयी थी | बहुत समय लगा था वापस normal होने में | हम यह भी चाहते हैं कि न्याय हो | लेकिन Sir, कड़वाहट नहीं है | कम से कम हिन्दुओं के लिए तो नहीं |

I was a bit taken aback with this last statement. Because whatever the Sikh community in India went through after Mrs. Indira Gandhi’s assassination in 1984 was truly horrific.

समझा  नहीं |

Sir, हम लोग दिल्ली आये ही इसीलिए थे क्योंकि मेरे parents Khalistan movement से नाराज़ थे | Sir 1984 में जो सिखों के साथ हुआ, वो बिल्कुल गलत था | और उसका न्याय होना चाहिए | लेकिन सिखों ने भी पंजाब में बहुत गलतियां की थी उससे पहले | मेरे parents के कुछ हिन्दू दोस्त भी मारे गए थे | अमृतसर में हमारे पडोसी थे | सिख नहीं थे | लेकिन पंजाबी थे | और उससे भी क्या फरक पड़ता है Sir | यह देश सब का है | हर किसी को कहीं भी रहने की freedom होनी चाहिए | आज भी parents उनको याद करते हैं | एक दिन आँगन में बैठ के साथ साथ dinner किया | और अगले दिन सुबह मालुम पड़ा कि रात को उनको मार दिया गया | बहुत धक्का लगा था मेरे parents को | और फिर 1984 में उनके हिन्दू दोस्तों ने ही बचाया | अगर कड़वाहट और गुस्सा है तो उन politicians से जो इस तरह की आग फैलाने में शामिल होते हैं | हिंदुओं से नहीं | उन्होंने भी बहुत खोया और हमने भी | और Sir, जहां तक बात रही Operation Blue Star की, लोग कहते हैं कि Golden Temple, जो एक धर्म का स्थल है  वहां army भेज के भिंडरावाले और उसके साथियों को मारना गलत था | लेकिन एक बात बताइये Sir, एक धर्म स्थल में भिंडरावाले और उनके गिरोह का रहना, जिनके कारण पता नहीं कितने ही निर्दोष लोगों की हत्या हुई, और वहां इतने हथियार इकट्ठे करना, यह सब सही था? मैं तो नहीं मानता Sir | अगर Operation Blue Star गलत था भी, तो उसके पहले जो हो रहा था वो भी गलत था | ताली दोनों हाथों से बजी थी Sir | आधे सच से कुछ हासिल नहीं होगा Sir | सबको बैठ कर पूरा सच देखना होगा |

तुम बहुत गहरी सोच रखते हो | अच्छा है | कम लोग हैं जो इतनी maturity रख सकते हैं |

जी Sir | (With a little laugh) और काफी लोग नाराज़ भी हो जाते हैं अगर ऐसे बात की जाए |

वो तो है |

Sir आप ही बताइये, महाराष्ट्र में कुछ लोग बोलते हैं कि यहां सिर्फ मराठी लोग रहें | कल बंगाल में कहेंगे यहाँ सिर्फ बंगाली रहेंगे | परसों केरल में सिर्फ मलयाली | यह भी कोई सोचने का तरीका है? इतनी मुश्किल से तो 1947 में आज़ादी हासिल की थी | कितना sacrifice किया था कितने लोगों ने | भगत सिंह, चंद्रशेखर आज़ाद, सुखदेव … और हम फिर लग गए देश के टुकड़े करने | और अगर मैं यह सब गलत मानता हूँ तो मुझे Khalistan movement को भी गलत मानना होगा | सर हिन्दू, सिख, मुसलमान, ईसाई, तमिल, बंगाली, मराठी, पंजाबी … क्या यह सब लोग आज हमारी सेना में नहीं हैं? इनमे से कौन है जो इस देश की आज़ादी और सुरक्षा के लिए गोली खाने के लिए तैयार नहीं है? तो फिर मतलब क्या बनता है अलग अलग होने की बात करने का? इतना बढ़िया देश है सर | सब मिलके रहें, खुश रहें | ये सब कमली बातें हैं और कमले काम हैं Sir | अमेरिका को देखो Sir, नाम भी यूनाइटेड स्टेट्स ऑफ़ अमेरिका है और वो हैं भी यूनाइटेड | और हमें देखो, कोई हद नहीं छोड़ते डिवाइडेड स्टेट्स ऑफ़ इंडिया बनने में | 

Sir धर्म के नाम पे लड़ाई बिलकुल बेमतलब की लड़ाई है | उसका कोई सर पैर नहीं है |

I was smiling now. It was eerie how closely Mandeep’s thoughts were echoing mine. I let him continue.

Sir आप ही बताओ | मैं सिख हूँ | गुरु ग्रन्थ साहब जी के अलावा किसी को नहीं मानता | और ना ही किसी और के सामने अपना सर झुकाता हूँ | गुरूद्वारे जाता हूँ, सेवा करता हूँ, अपनी family के साथ खुश हूँ | अब मुझे क्या मिलेगा यह सोच के कि आपका धर्म क्या है, आप आस्तिक हो या नास्तिक, मंदिर जाते हो या मस्जिद या चर्च, या कहीं भी नहीं | आप अगर मेरी life में दखल नहीं देते तो मैं आपकी life में दखल क्यों दूं? उससे किसी को क्या मिलता है?

मंदीप, अगर इतनी सी बात सबके समझ में आ जाए तो हमारे कितने झगड़े ऐसे ही ख़तम हो जाएँ | और हमें कोई कभी धर्म के नाम पे अलग अलग करके फ़ायदा भी नहीं उठा पायेगा |

We were just about entering the airport premises now. There was a very calm understanding silence between us. We were kindred spirits. I asked him one last question:

मंदीप, तुम कहाँ तक पढ़े?

Sir, 12th के बाद father के साथ काम करने लग गया था | घर पे मुश्किल थी | लेकिन अभी 2 साल पहले ही correspondence course से पंजाबी में B.A. की है | M.A. भी करूंगा |

This is just about when he pulled up to the curb.

लीजिये Sir, आ गए airport |

बहुत अच्छा लगा मंदीप तुमसे बातें करके | आशा है तुम और तुम्हारी सारी family खुश रहेगी | अगर फिर मिलेंगे तो ज़रूर पूछुंगा तुम्हारी M.A. की पढ़ाई के बारे में |

Mandeep responded with a genuine smile: जी सर, ज़रूर | Happy journey sir. रब का आशीर्वाद हमेशा आपके साथ रहे |

Thanks Mandeep! Good luck and goodbye!

And he drove off. Leaving me in utter awe of the depth of humanity and wisdom this simple soul possessed.

(to be continued... Link)

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Translation of my conversation with Mandeep:

Me: What's your good name?

Mandeep: Mandeep Sir.

Me: I'm Brijesh. Your driving's good. You are taking care of people around you. That's a good thing to do.

Mandeep: Thank you Sir.

Who all are in your family?

Sir, My Mother and Father, wife and three kids. One younger brother who is a pilot in the Air Force and is currently posted in Amritsar.

Very nice. And how old are the kids?

Sir my elder son Sukhvinder is five years old. He's just moved from kindergarten to first. Then we've recently had twins: one son, Harvinder, and a daughter, Harjot.

That's great! Congrats!

Thank you Sir.

And how old are you?

27 Sir. I was born in 1984.

Here in Delhi itself?

Yes Sir. As such we're from Punjab. But my parents moved here in 1982.

1984 was a difficult year. Your parents must have told you.

Yes Sir. I was born about two weeks after Mrs. Gandhi's assassination. A Hindu family had kept us hidden at their home. I was born at their home itself. My Mother tells me that if they hadn't hidden us in their home there's no saying what may have happened. A lot of my parents acquaintances and friends were killed.

That was a very shameful time. I'm glad you folks escaped. You must carry a lot of pain in your heart. Your parents perhaps more than you. I don't know if you will ever be able to forgive.

Sir, there is certainly pain. So many of their friends were killed. So many others lost everything they possessed. Father's shop was also burnt down. It took a long time for us to get back to normalcy. We also want that there should be justice for what happened. But we are not bitter Sir, at least not towards Hindus.

I was a bit taken aback with this last statement. Because whatever the Sikh community in India went through after Mrs. Indira Gandhi's assassination in 1984 was truly horrific.

I don't understand.

Sir, we had in fact relocated to Delhi because my parents were not in support of the Khalistan movement. Whatever happened with the Sikhs in 1984 was certainly wrong. And there needs to be justice. But its also a fact that many Sikhs had gone wrong in Punjab before that. Some of my parents' Hindu friends were also killed during that period of militancy. They were our neighbors in Amritsar. Not Sikhs, but they were Punjabis. And how does even that matter Sir? This country belongs to everyone and people should have the freedom to live wherever they wish to. Even today my parents remember them. They had dinner together in our courtyard one evening. And the next morning my parents found that their friends had been killed during the night. This hurt and distressed my parents very deeply. Then again in 1984, it was their Hindu friends who saved them. If we are bitter and angry today, it is with those politicians who stoke communal fires. Not with the Hindu community per se. They also lost a lot just as we did. And as far as Operation Blue Star goes, many people say that it was wrong for the army to storm the Golden Temple, which is a sacred place of worship for the Sikhs, and kill Bhindrawale and his friends. But tell me Sir, was it right for Bhindrawale and his group, who were responsible for the murder of so many innocent people, to hide and stock up arms and ammunition in the Golden Temple in the first place? I don't think so Sir. If Operation Blue Star was wrong then so was whatever preceded that. It takes two hands to clap Sir. Half truths won't lead us anywhere. Everyone will need to sit together and face the whole truth.

You are speaking with depth Mandeep. Not everyone displays this level of maturity.

Thanks Sir. (With a laugh...) And many people take offense when one speaks in this manner.

That's quite true.

Sir, think about it, some people in Maharashtra say that only Marathis should stay there, tomorrow people in Bengal will say that only Bengalis should stay there, day after tomorrow it will be about only Malyaalis staying in Kerela... Is this any way to think? We had obtained independence with so much difficulty in 1947. It took such immense sacrifice from so many : Bhagat Singh, Chandrasekhar Azad, Sukhdev ... and we are already back to breaking the country into pieces. And if I feel all this is wrong then I also have to accept that the Khalistan movement was wrong. Sir, today aren't there Hindus, Sikhs, Muslims, Christians, Tamilians, Bengalis, Marathis, Punjabis, ... all of them ... in our army? And who among these is unwilling to take a bullet to safeguard this country? What sense does it make then to even talk about breaking up into pieces? It's such a wonderful country Sir. Everyone can live together, be happy. These are all mindless words and acts Sir. Take a look at America Sir. The name's United States of America and they actually are united. And look at us, we spare no effort to become the Divided States of India.

Sir, fights in the name of religion are absolutely baseless. There's no head or tail at all to those fights.

I was smiling now. It was eerie how closely Mandeep's thoughts were echoing mine. I let him continue.

Sir you tell me, I am a Sikh : I do not believe in anyone except the Guru Granth Sahib (the sacred text of the Sikhs), and neither do I bow my head in front of anyone else. I go to the Gurudwara, I do sewa, and live happily with my family. Now what will I gain by worrying about what your religion is, whether you are a theist or an atheist, whether you go to the temple or mosque or church, or maybe nowhere. If you don't interfere with my life, why should I interfere with yours? What does anyone get from doing all this?

Mandeep, if this simple little matter was so clear to everyone so many of our fights would just stop by themselves. And no one would ever be able to derive advantage from dividing us in the name of religion.

We were just about entering the airport premises now. There was a very calm understanding silence between us. We were kindred spirits. I asked him one last question:

Mandeep, till where have you studied?

Sir I had started working with my father after 12th as conditions at home were not so great then. But just two years ago I completed my B.A. in Punjabi through a correspondence course. I'll also do a M.A.

This is just about when he pulled up to the curb.

Here we are Sir, we've arrived at the airport.

It was really good talking with you Mandeep. I hope that you and your entire family will have happy times ahead. And if we meet again I'll be sure to ask you about your M.A. studies.

Mandeep responded with a genuine smile: Absolutely Sir. Have a happy journey. May God's blessings always be with you.

Thanks Mandeep! Good luck and goodbye!

And he drove off. Leaving me in utter awe of the depth of humanity and wisdom this simple soul possessed.

(to be continued... Link)